engineering terms funny

Engineer: "It explains why my estimates are always irrational." Arguing with an Engineer is like wrestling with a pig in the mud, after a while you realize the pig enjoys it. Now he proceeded with a three-stage demonstration photographs, namely (1) a car on fire, (2) a man fighting the fire with the device, then (3) a clean car. To the optimist, the glass is half full. Formication is another interesting, if, creepy, scientific term. By using ThoughtCo, you accept our, Yes, There Are Chemistry Jokes and They Are Funny, Great Summer Engineering Programs for High School Students, Chemistry Jokes and Puns With Explanations. Did you hear the one about the constipated engineer? The mathematician gets his callipers out and measures the diameter, then evaluates the integral. The physicist fetches a bowl of water, drops the ball in and measures the displacement. One of the major companies has an official term for this slimy stuff that floats on the water: Spooge. Our policies; Return or exchange an item; Trade In Printer . St Peter replies, “Do you know how many engineers it takes to get an ounce of brains?”. This is looking good and the engineer is building a great body and dreaming about all the fun he will have when he gets back to earth. Pesticide deadly to bees now easily detected in honey. How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?

The Milky Ways Bulge is somewhere in the order of 10,000 light-years across.

Dr. Helmenstine holds a Ph.D. in biomedical sciences and is a science writer, educator, and consultant. A vicar, a doctor and an engineer. Laugh at 17 really funny engineering jokes. Enjoy!

To a creative engineer, the glass is half full of liquid and half full of air. - Joke of the Day - Funny Pic of Day > Other Options - Link to Us - Submit a Joke: The engineer's terms Top 25 Engineer's Terms and Expressions (What they say versus what they mean) A number of different approaches are being tried. Science. And you Eng. Chemical Engineer Job Profile and Career Information. Science. How do I phrase it? Great find. It is actually a specific form of another term, paresthesias, that includes other tingling skin sensations. Here’s a good, clean one I like to tell at mixed company seminars: An engineer dies and is met at the Pearly Gates by St Peter. Answer: Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had, in a way you don't understand. If you have a wife and a mistress, both women think you are with the other so you can go to work get more done". What is this?" (We are still … Broad white beach, turquoise water, palm trees, bikini models serving martinis. It can also be used to insert operations at the beginning or end of another subroutine. (We sat down and had coffee together.) Real Engineers say “It’s 77 degrees Fahrenheit, 25 degrees Celsius, and 298 Kelvin” and all you say is “Isn’t it a nice day?” Real Engineers wear badges so they don’t forget who they are. Many industries and disciplines of study have their own specific sets of terminology. Thanks to the deployment of the Hubble Space Telescope we now know this isn't the case. Luckily, they have a bag with a can of food in it, but no tin opener. Bill asks Satan, “What happened to the beach and the bikini models?”, Satan replies, “Oh, that was just the demo version”. River Ridge Commerce Center in Southern Indiana has a central location, a large bank of land ready to develop and an abundant supply of clean water. You’ve got an engineer?

An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates.

Cleavage structure forms vary depending on the rock type, amount of deformation and degree of metamorphism that occurs. Cost, schedule, or performance… choose any two.

"The clothes probably wouldn't have fit you. However, glossaries like this one are useful for looking up, comparing and reviewing large numbers of terms together. FRIDAY FUNNY: Engineering A Sense Of Humor. "I was walking back from the computer lab when the most beautiful woman I had ever seen rode up on this bike, stopped, took all her clothes off and said to me 'Take what you want!'" I’ve told you I’m a beautiful princess, that I’ll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. I’ll make sure they get the best treatment at the eye unit in the hospital too. This protein is one of three others within a mammalian signal pathway family called hedgehogs. Eng. Close project coordination. :uhh: My sex talk with dad, approx age 10 - verbatim. An engineer, conversely, starts out knowing a lot about a little. the truth is so funny sometimes. They all agreed it was not prostitution. In case you weren't aware a Hinny is a domestic equine hybrid between a male horse (a stallion) and a female donkey (a jenny). (We just hired three punk kids out of school.) Where did you get it?”, “Well, ” replies the other, “I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young coed rides up on this bike. You are only really likely to hear this term if you work in the industry as an engineer or as technical support helpdesk staff. Scientist: What's the Difference? Client: "Why multiply by pi?" Can we harness a plant's ability to synthesize medicinal compounds? ", A girl asked her boyfriend, an engineer, "Don't you want to see where I was operated upon for appendicitis? An extensive report is being prepared on a fresh approach. A 12 year old boy and his father are new to the Western World and entered a mall for the first time. An optimist says the glass is half full, and the pessimist half empty. It can be a challenge, especially for us engineers who may not enjoy the written word as much as other academics do.

A vicar, doctor and engineer were playing a round of golf. A water use reduction project has earned Georgia-Pacific’s consumer products mill in Palatka, FL the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency’s (EPA’s) ENERGY STAR Top Project for 2020. This is the body parts room. Mechanical Engineers build weapons; Civil Engineers build targets. The next bins are arms, and the engineer buys two super strong arms for $5 each. Don't you know the same? Jeez, how could I forget - in the Navy you have PMS just about every day! Startled, the tourist went over to the shopkeeper and said, “That was a very expensive monkey. Real Engineers’ briefcases contain a Phillips screwdriver, a copy of “Quantum Physics,” and a half of a peanut butter sandwich. After a little bit of introduction and talking about the physicist's life, the psychologist looks at his notes and tells the physicist, "Well, I think I know what brings you down the most. The other two members of the hedgehog family are the desert hedgehog (DHH) and Indian hedgehog (IHH). This reaction occurs in many other mammals besides humans and great apes and is most obvious in animals like cats and porcupines. Always try to fix the hardware with software.

Due to the thousands of engineering graduates and highly-skilled professionals who are also looking for better opportunities, more benefits, and job security every year, competition is tough. So he went to a psychologist to see if the psychologist could help him feel better again. He fitted it with a collar and leash, handed it to the customer, saying, “That’ll be $5000.” The customer paid and walked out with his monkey. If you scour through a Geological dictionary you will come across some interesting and, at times, pseudo-risque terms. Place an order; Edit or cancel orders; Payments we accept ; Shipping & Return Policies. The engineer sees the glass as twice as big as it needs to be. What is the definition of an engineer? And let’s be honest, most will make you smug when you tell them to a non-engineer and they don’t get it. August 22, 2012. Who Says Engineers Have A Weird Sense Of Humor?

Anything practical you learn will be obsolete before you use it, except the complex math, which you will never use.

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